Currently Listening One of the Boys By Katy Perry Hot N Cold see related

ShamWOW!

Wow, so i know no one reads this but im going to vent on here anyway.

so i thought that things were amazing, and to be honest, they are! i'm finally with someone who makes me happy, and he just is exactly what i need right now.

im working on getting exempt from living on campus so i can get my own place, CROSS YOUR FINGERS FOR ME POR FAVOR!

but ya know, despite all of these good things for me, im still more confused and down then i should be. My piece of shit family and my horrible past haunts me, it's around every corner its in every horrific message left by my mother with her shrill voice that destroys my dreams at night. i can't escape her, i can't escape this, i feel like im suffocating and drowning and burning alive. oh yeah, all at the same time. but since i have such trust issues im not sure who i can REALLY open up to about it all, and that might be the most terrifying. i look around me and i see people there, and i can feel them there...yet im alone.

 'how can you spend so much time with someone only to find out they are a complete stranger?'.

i don't get it, i quit

everything, i honestly don't know what to do anymore

and p.s i want a ShamWOW

so apparently, this is what i look like to a lot of people...hmm funny i thought i would be used to it by now

Currently Listening Riot! By Paramore Fences see related

Classes at 8:00 in the morning...should not exsist

So Summer school started and my 8 a.m class is insane, its a class based mainly on debates and your opinions, which i'm usually all for but i can't really argue at 8 in the damn morning.

my other class is amazing though, i love it. i love the teacher so much and so i really enjoy the class! but two 2 hour classes back to back is brutal.

today is my 9 month anniversary with Ben, which i couldn't be happier about, i love him, and i love everything about him, and i love our relationship, but i'll stop because no one really wants to read it haha.

but other than that not much has happened, same old same old, i'll see you all later!

Currently Listening Dying Is Your Latest Fashion By Escape the Fate Situations see related

wow its been awhile

So i used to just use this for pointless information back when people checked it regularly. but i feel like i need to update people on my life, hey why not!

OH and i wanted to change my username, apparently it cost money so fuck it, i've had this username since i was like 15, but whatever...its lame, and i don't care

well lets see, i'm out of highschool FINALLY

i'm in college now, woo hoo? i guess haha and i'm triple majoring! why? because im a flipping dill hole!

but yep i've moved into my new apartment (well not mine, but im living here for the summer) and i couldn't get to sleep and my mind started to wander and i needed to vent somewhere, maybe its me and i worry to much, maybe it's the people around me who i sometimes feel could care less about me. i think everything happens for a reason and i think i am feeling this way for some reason, not sure what yet. i feel like some people have a screwed up idea of who i am even if they havent met me, just heard about me, i'm leaving my highschool reputation behind (or atleast trying to) and move on. but how do you move on from a past that follows you and messes with your head when you finally let it over power you? im starting to feel the people i am really close to aren't feeling the same way about me, a lot of things are just one sided and i am just not important anymore.

oh well, i'm back to my old motto, people suck. but i'll survive, now i need to force myself to sleep

night kids

Ah Crikey...

RIP STEVE....we miss you!

1962-2006

and i don't think its very funny to make fun of his death...some fuckers at my school just need to shut up sometimes...when i found out i damn near cried. i didn't laugh. i didn't poke fun. what about his 2 children? and his wife? this isn't funny....i hope something happens to your family...who will be laughing then?!